Sea of Hope
Sue to Mark 15 pt. 2
It's late and I should be doing other things . . . I have so little self-discipline these days! A confession . . . I've allowed my mind to fill with thoughts of you. It is a good thing we're trying to inject a little reality into our cyber-relationship - but it doesn't seem to have provided the calm braking effect I was counting on (for me, anyway). I am realizing that what I know about you is genuinely wonderful. It is difficult to believe that there is such a man and that he could be genuinely interested in me. The enormity of what is happening here struck me today. I feel like I'm standing in front of Mt. Everest . . . with all the impossible thrills and highs beckoning me onward and upward - and all the treacherous slopes and sheer cliffs threatening. Or like I'm on a giant Tsunami, something with great energy and power taking me for the ride of my life. I can either be dragged along in fear, or "catch the wave" with enthusiasm and ride it freely on to the shore to be either dashed on the rocks, or land in paradise. We both have good reason to be afraid - but isn't fear somehow a part of the excitement? I acknowledge the dangers, but I very willingly face and accept them for just a shot at paradise.
This was going to be just a short note, not the full response I'm planning - but I wanted to just touch on one thing: I abhor those tiresome women who blab on incessantly about the most mind-numbing inane things. That is not what I mean about talking too much. What I most desire is INTERSECTION with another mind - to explore another inner universe (what we have been doing) and thereby enrich and sort of evolve my own. Meaningful interchange. I wouldn't want to "debate" you on an issue - I would want to explore it with you, discover the nuances your thinking gives it, compare and adjust it with my own. "Conceding" is such a sad word. It implies breaking off, giving up, going away. Discussion and interchange should ultimately be bonding in nature, I think.
On that note, I'll bid adieu . . .